Tail Wagging the Dog

The first day of law school a woman came to talk to us about the support group for lawyers, mainly drug and alcohol addiction. What stays with me the most was a story she told about a friend who worked their way up the legal ladder, making mid six figures, but later committed suicide. The pressure of managing client expectations, always having to be on top of one's professional game mixed with depression proved to be too much.

A few years later during my last year of law school I met a woman who abandoned her law license in favor of managing a parachute diving business. Amidst my disbelief that someone could simply walk away from their law license, she explained, "I'm happy. All my lawyer friends are jealous, still stressed out dealing with clients."

On a level, I can relate. The realities of client expectations are weighty. Very rarely are there outcomes where there are clear winners and losers. Truth is, most lawsuits/claims result in a compromise. Both sides walk away unhappy, one believes he paid too much, the other that he received too little.

What I have learned in my very short time of practicing from wise attorneys: manage expectations on the front end. Yes, there will be blowback from your clients. Recently a client tried asking me the same question four different ways to get the answer they wanted. "No, we're not discussing this again". As my supervising attorney poignantly told me a few days back, "Don't let the tail wag the dog".

That's not to say clients have no input. But as an attorney, you are the expert on the law, not your clients. Otherwise, they wouldn't be paying you. Learn when to step in and say "No, we are/are not doing this". You'll gain your client's respect, even if it comes at the price of an initial negative emotional response.

In my practice, I was tossed straight into the deep end of dealing with clients. It hasn't been easy. But it is a lot easier to convince a client to take a settlement and avoid costly litigation when I have gained their trust being honest from the start.